updated WI results and checking points.

I just realized that the receptionist at my WW meeting made an error in my weigh-in book – I actually lost 2.4 lbs this week, not 2.2, for a total loss of 71 lbs, not 70.8. Not a big deal, I just think it’s funny since Kate and I were just discussing how annoying it is that the receptionists always seem to be making mistakes like this. Ha ha! Anyway, I’m glad I figured it out – something was seeming ‘off’ about the weigh-in, I just couldn’t put my finger on it! Anyway, I updated my sidebar accordingly.

Shaun and I are off to The Keg tonight to celebrate the end of his contract, I can’t wait! We go to The Keg every couple of months or so (it’s just up the street from us), and I remember looking up the points the first time we went and settling on the Filet Mignon, for 13 pts, and a baked potato for 6 pts. More than I’d normally spend, but worth it for a good steak, in my opinion. So that’s what I always order. Anyway, today I suddenly had a motivation to check out the points again – I found that everything on the website had been redesigned, including the nutritional info, and that my beloved filet was now clocking in at 25 POINTS!!! Not to put too fine a point on it, but I nearly crapped myself.

Luckily this story has a happy ending. After playing around a bit with the nutritional info tool, trying to figure out what else I might be able to eat, I realized what was happening: the info provided was for the whole meal, not just the steak, so it included the twice-baked potato (12pts.) Yay! My beloved steak was still ‘just’ 13 pts.

I am a happy girl again! But I thought this was a good reminder to occasionally recheck the points on things, even when you’ve been eating them for eons. You never know when a company or restaurant is going to change their recipe or cooking process.

the dreaded week 5.

Ok, bloggies, I need a pep talk!

This week I'm on week 5 of the Couch To 5K. For those of you who have done it, I probably don't need to explain why I'm filled with dread. For those of you who aren't familiar, this is the week where your amount of running time increases dramatically -- basically from 5 minutes intervals to 20 minutes solid.

Mild. Panic. Attack.

In fact, the past 2 times I've attempted this program, I quit at week 4. Without even trying week 5. Because I was too scared to even try it. That is a thing about me -- I psych myself out too much and get totally freaked out about stuff that hasn't even happened yet.

True story: the night before I started kindergarten, I woke my mom up crying in the middle of the night.

"What's wrong?" she asked. "Are you afraid to start kindergarten?"

"No!" I sobbed. "I'm afraid to start HIGH SCHOOL!"

Ha ha! My mom still enjoys telling this story. :) But I think it really proves how deep down these fears run for me, and how capable I am of totally overthinking things.

Anyway! This time around I've made it further into the C25K than I ever have before. On Sunday I did the first day of Week 5 -- five minute intervals. Today I tackled the second day's run, of 8 minute intervals. But Friday -- Friday I face down the big daddy. Twenty minutes.

So! I know a lot of you have done this program before. Tell me about your experience with the Week 5, Day 3 run. (Or if you learned to run a different way, tell me about the first time you ran 20 min. straight.) Tell me about how you thought you couldn't do it and then you totally did. Or alternately, tell me about how you couldn't actually do it the first time but you kept at it and soon enough you were rocking it. I need INSPIRATIONAL STORIES here!

Also! I need inspirational music! What are some good work out songs? My current faves are:

Stronger - Kanye West

Pump It - Black Eyed Peas

Crank Dat - Soulja Boy

So you can probably see where my tastes lie. :) But I'm open to anything that'll keep me motivated.

WI results and a running goal!

It’s Tuesday so that means: weigh in day! I was down 2.2 lbs, for a total loss of 70.8 lbs. Can I get a “Woooo!”? And possibly a “Hoooo!”?

This week's stats:
Flex Points used: 35/35
Activity Points earned: 24
Activity Points used: 2/24
Weigh-in Results: -2.2 lbs

Today I also took the plunge and signed up for my first 5k! Eeek! I kept reading about all the "Halibloggers" participating in the Santa Shuffle down there in Halifax, so I pitched it to some of the GTA bloggers and we decided we’d just have to do one too! So a bunch of us have now signed up to do the Santa Shuffle right here in Toronto, on December 5.

I can’t wait! I’m working my way through the Couch To 5K right now, and it’s going pretty well, but I wanted to do something to guarantee that I’d finish, and I think signing up for a race is the best way to do this. Especially signing up for a race that I’ve now convinced other people to do with me! Ha ha! I’m allowing for the possibility that I still might not be up for running the ENTIRE thing, but I’m going to bust my ass between now and then to make sure I can at least run most of it!

I also have a couple of ‘real life’ friends who may be participating, and I’m looking forward to hopefully doing a couple of runs with them beforehand. As I was saying to one person today, I never IN MY LIFE thought I would reach the point where I considered running a 5K to be a fun thing to do with my friends, but here we are. Here I am.

And you know what? I LOVE IT.

how to get the most out of your Weight Watcher meetings.

I’ve been really excited to read of all the bloggers who are recently taking the plunge and joining the world of Weight Watcher meetings! I’ve been going to meetings for about a year now, and I KNOW they’ve been a huge part of my success. So in light of that, I thought I’d offer up some of the best advice I have for making the most of your meetings.

1. GO. I guess that’s obvious, right? But really, GO. Every week. Even when – especially when – you think you’ve had a bad week. It’s tough to walk through those doors when you’ve just eaten an entire box of Halloween candy, but the more you give yourself permission to skip the meeting when you’ve been ‘bad’, the more you’re REALLY giving yourself permission to BE bad. So go!

2. STAY. Sometimes this won’t be an option, and there have definitely been times when I’ve had to leave before or part-way through the meeting. But try to stay, and really try to get something out of the meeting, even if it’s just one little nugget of inspiration or motivation. The reality is, you’ll have some bad weeks. And you’ll show up, and have a bad weigh-in. And you’ll start thinking crazy thoughts like, "What is the point of this, I think I will just go eat a whole carrot cake, that will teach me!” But then you stay for the meeting and you think a little about what you really want, and how to get it, and you walk out of there refreshed and nixing all cake-purchasing plans.

3. Find a meeting you like. I think it’s obviously important to have a good leader, and members you can relate to, but for me, it’s equally important to find a time and a place that really works for me. Because honestly, if I know I’m going to have a less-than-stellar weigh-in, how psyched am I going to be to get up super early in the morning or trek half-way across the city just to find that out? Not very.

4. TALK. Don’t be shy about celebrating your successes or asking for help or sharing your tips. Even if you’re new. You might feel like you don’t have enough experience or track record to contribute, but honestly, half the time I like listening to the newer people better than the hardened old regulars. The noobs are so enthusiastic. :) I heart them. And make sure to ask for your rewards and stickers, and whatnot. I frigging love those things.

5. LISTEN. Look, I know people get down on Weight Watchers meetings because supposedly all they do is talk about processed foods, but I’ve been to tonnes of meetings, and I find that even though, yes, processed food comes up, I’ve never been to a single meeting where I didn’t hear at least ONE THING that was valuable to me. Even the people who – gasp! – eat processed foods, are working to develop good habits and do better for themselves. Do yourself a favour and try to really listen to the people who are there, rather than focusing on what they’re eating.

6. Make a routine out of it. When I first started going to meetings last year, I went to one that was located inside a grocery store. I loved this because after every meeting, I would pop down and pick up all kinds of healthy foods while I was still feeling all pumped up from the meeting. Then I would go home and watch a downloaded episode of The Biggest Loser. I did this EVERY Thursday for awhile, and it was such a great way to get focused for the week. So try to add other elements to your meeting night / day that make it feel more like an ‘event’, more like ‘you time’. Just make sure your routine is actually conducive to your goals, and does not involve, say, binging at Burger King.

7. Check out the products. I swear I’m not a WW salesperson! BUT I do think some of their products are really useful: serving spoons that are ½ and 1 cup measures? Scales that weigh AND give you the points value? Electronic points calculators you can keep in your purse? SOLD. Not all the products are great (Weird-tasting cheese curls, I’m looking at you!) but some of it really is useful. I also big-time heart the 3-Month Journal.

Okay, I think that’s all I’ve got! How do you make the most out of your meeting? Feel free to share more tips in the comments. Let’s support our new Weight-Watching blogger friends! :)

a belated update.

Holy cow, I can't believe it's November! Where did October go?

Well, as you've probably mostly all read by now, on Friday I got to meet a bunch of Toronto bloggers! It was super fun, and as most have already mentioned, it was such a relief to hang out with people who 'get it'. We've already got plans for another meet-up, possibly a potluck -- maybe I'm pathetic but I seriously cannot think of many things that would be more fun than a weight-loss themed potluck. Getting to sample everyone's favourite low point recipes? Hells YES.

Anyway, we didn't manage to get too many photos, but here's the one Kerry got our waiter to take for us:

And here's a couple I managed to snap at Tim Horton's later. (Though strangely none of Kat? Sorry Kat!)

Kate and Tiffany

Kerry and Allie. Love this one because although you can't really tell, Allie was actually TRACKING HER FOOD when I snapped this. I love my fellow Weight Watchers!!

I also had the opportunity, on Thursday, to get together with another friend who I haven't seen in ages (Hi Allyson!). I like this person a lot, and she is also what I would call 'health-conscious', and so along with the usual girl-talk, we talked a lot about health, weight, running, etc. I'm feeling super excited about all these new people in my life who share my goals and understand my 'craziness'. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love love love the blogging community, but there's really something to be said for sharing a meal with people, or going on a run together. That's something pretty exciting, and something I feel I've really been missing this past year. Yay to new friends!

WI results and some thoughts on goal.

Weigh in today and I was quite pleased to be down 3lbs! Hello 180s! I haven’t seen you in, well – ever! And goodbye to one extra point a week – I’ll miss you but I know I can live without you.

That also means 68.6 lost total now! Wowsa!

ETA: Forgot to include my stats for the week! Here they are:
Flex Points used: 34/35
Activity Points earned: 21
Activity Points used: 0
Weigh-in result: -3.0

I’ve been thinking a bit about my goal weight lately. I know I just blogged about how this isn’t a journey and I don’t focus too much on ‘goals’, but the reality is I’m following a WW eating plan specifically designed for weight LOSS and eventually I’ll have to figure out where I want to stop and transition to an eating plan intended for weight MAINTENANCE.

The funny thing is when I first started with Weight Watchers, I thought the 155 goal weight (the top of my range) was impossible. In my mind, my end goal was more like 175-185. Now I’m THREE POUNDS away from that! It’s crazy to think I’ve come this far. And of course, I don’t feel that satisfied yet – I still can barely fit into regular-sized pants! So 155 is looking more and more reasonable. I mean, I’m still going to play it by ear. I think it’s okay to do that. (And to be honest, if I’d first walked into WW thinking I had to lose more than 100 lbs, I probably would have walked straight back out. And eaten a donut or four.) But now, to think that I might have 33 lbs left to goal – that I can deal with. I’ve already lost twice that much.

why i'm not a screw-up (and neither are you.)

Friday night I slipped.

I’m not sure how it happened. I was very delighted because I had just discovered that Ally McBeal was finally out on DVD (!!!), so I picked up the first season at HMV. I had a bottle of wine uncorked and breathing. I decided to throw a frozen pizza in the oven. It was going to be a good night.

The frozen pizza I buy is the Irresistibles brand from Metro. It’s about the same size as a regular frozen pizza, but it’s thin crust and has a bit less cheese (I think) and it works out to be 20 pts for the whole pizza, versus about 36 for a ‘regular’ one. Good deal, right? Shaun and I always split it, and I love it because I still get to feel like I’m indulging in eating HALF A PIZZA, but at 10 pts, that’s not too painful.

But Shaun had to work late on Friday so I was home alone. When the pizza was cooked, I cut it into quarters, took my two pieces into the living room and left the other two on the stove, ostensibly for Shaun to have when he got home. But within five minutes of finishing my two slices, I started rationalizing with myself that I could have another slice. Only five points! What the heck! Go for it!

So I had a third slice. And then: yes. Before I knew it, I had eaten the fourth as well.

I ate an entire frozen pizza. I felt sick.

I immediately hid the evidence so Shaun wouldn’t know, but then I realized how stupid that was. So when he got home I announced, “I am an idiot and ate an entire frozen pizza!” He just kind of laughed at me.

Later, though, in bed, I found myself tearfully telling him about how much I still struggle with food. How there were times in the past (pre-WW) when I’d actually eaten pizza OUT OF THE GARBAGE because I had this COMPULSION to eat it, like a tidal wave in my brain. I felt the same way then as I did that night, I explained, eating that whole pizza. Then I cried a little, felt sorry for myself, worried I’d never be successful at this, and then fell asleep.

And then the next morning I got up and promptly GOT THE HELL OVER MYSELF.

You know what? I screwed up. I ate a whole pizza, oink oink oink. But it fit into my weekly points, it wasn’t a super-high point pizza anyway (I won’t even buy those), and I made the rest of my weekend stellar. Ate light, drank lots of water, walked six miles on Saturday and went to the gym on Sunday.

Here’s the thing: I think the more we think of ourselves as failures, the more we fail. The more we think of ourselves as someone who can’t control themselves around food, the more we stop controlling ourselves. The more power you give your weaknesses, well … the more power they have.

I screwed up on Friday, and I’ve screwed up in the past. I’m sure I’ll continue to screw up in the future. But I choose not to dwell on those screw-ups because I don’t want them to be part of the reality I’m creating for myself. I don’t even usually blog about them, for the same reason, but I am this time because I’ve seen quite a few blog posts from other people who have had the same screw ups and who beat themselves up in a way that just breaks my heart.

So I’m here to tell you that on Friday, I ate an entire frozen pizza, and I’m still okay.

Am I proud that I ate a whole pizza? Well, not particularly. Am I going to put any leftover pizza immediately in to the fridge next time? Yeah, that’s probably a good idea. Am I going to start thinking of myself as someone who can’t control themselves around food, someone who’s too weak to overcome a craving, someone who will never be able to lose weight? No way. Cause do you know how many times I DO control myself around food? Do you know how many cravings I ignore over the course of a day? And I bet you do too. I bet you control yourself a lot more than you think you do.

My leader once suggested, if you’re struggling, to keep TWO food logs: one for what you actually ate, and one for everything you wanted to eat/could have eaten. If you need proof of how well you’re doing, that’s the fastest way to see it.

We all just a need a better story -- one where we’re not the comedic side-kick, but the real hero.