Thursday, May 20, 2010

all over.

Happy day-before-Friday! Even better, happy day-before-Friday-of-a-long-weekend! :D

I’ll warn you now, this update is going to be all over the place. A picture, a confession, an announcement. Let’s start with …

The picture.

On Saturday I went shopping. You know this dress?

Well I saw it in the store (yes, the exact dress, made by Halston), so I tried it on. It was wild! I’ve never tried on a $400 dress before, nor have I ever worn a size 10. I can’t decide which was more exciting! (Sorry for the crappy picture, I’m not so good at the iPhone self-portraits yet.)

(Needless to say, I didn't buy it. I hardly have a need for a $400 figure-skating-costume. Seriously, I don't know how they make these clothes look so stylish in the movies. This dress was WEIRD.)

The confession.

You may recall that last week, after completing my Clean Eating ‘challenge’, I weighed in at 169. It seemed like I’d finally broken my plateau. Sadly, this week I am right back up to 171. My sticking point. But here’s the real confession: I don’t care.

Not “I don’t care” like I’m going to start stuffing my face and gain back 50 lbs. But “I don’t care” as in this seems to be a weight that my body is happy at right now, and for the first time probably in my whole life, I feel happy too. I like the way I feel. I like the energy I have. I like the way I look in clothes, and I like that I can actually buy a few nice things. I like how I’m eating and living and I can see sustaining this for absolutely ever. So my weight and I have reached a bit of a truce for now.

Quitting Weight Watchers was a good decision for me, I think. So was starting yoga. Both of these things have (in different ways) taken the focus off the number, and put it back into the feeling, where it belongs. And the feeling is good, my friends. The feeling is good.

The announcement.

I decided to buy a ticket to the Healthy Living Summit this year! I’d been thinking about it for awhile, but I wasn’t going to do it, because I didn’t want to go by myself. I’m so shy in group situations like that. But I remember thinking last year that it looked like so much fun, and the agenda for this year sounds even better, so I just decided to go for it.

I guess this goes somewhat along with what I was saying about my weight – I feel like I’ve reached a bit of a truce with myself and I suddenly feel a bit less awkward – or maybe I’m just more at peace with my awkwardness – but either way, I feel like this is something I want to do, and by jove, I’m going to do it!

So in August I’ll be off to Chicago for a few days – I booked a couple extra days off work so I can hopefully turn it into a little mini-vacation. Is it sad that I am already insanely excited about going to Target and Trader Joe’s?? Probably. :D