WI results and a weird week.

Went to WI today and was down 1.6 lbs. Total loss now is 47.2 lbs. I'm inching up on 50 lbs!

This is a weird week, with Canada Day falling right in the middle. Work Monday and Tuesday, off Wednesday, work Thursday and Friday. Shaun and I don't really have any big plans for the holiday -- we're going to pick up some beer and have ourselves a major house-cleaning day. Our apartment is a disaster and ... shhh, don't tell anyone this but ... we still haven't even unpacked from our vacation. It is a saddddddddd state of affairs.

is it friday yet?

I am so hungry lately! I don’t know what’s going on, but I find myself starving every day! Especially in the mornings / early afternoons. I eat my breakfast around 9:30 and by 10:30 I’m ready for lunch. What is up with that? I had to skip my planned soup + crackers lunch, and instead go get a 6” sub from Subway, loaded up with veggies and roasted chicken. I even splurged on a Coke Zero and a bag of Baked Lays. This is one of my favourite indulgent meals. I never have pop or chips anymore so it always feels like such a treat.

I also popped into Indigo while I was in the area, and I ended up buying FOUR magazines. !!! I know. !!! I got Self (because it had my beloved Jillian Michaels on the cover), Women’s Health (dunno, just appealed to me), Clean Eating, and Cooking Light. I’m hoping the latter two will give me some meal ideas for the next couple of months. I’m sick of most of my current meals, but it’s so hot that I’m not motivated to try a lot of cooking right now. So in some ways magazines are better than cookbooks, because they’re much timelier. They actually take into account what season it is, what kind of produce is available, what holidays are coming up, etc. Both the mags look like they have lots of simple salad ideas, sandwiches, frozen desserts, etc. so here’s hoping.

Still no idea what to make for dinner tonight though. This is why I end up always eating wraps. This is why I’m sick of wraps. :)

one of those days.

Today was one of those days: one of those amazing days that make you realize "holy cow, I really have lost a fair crapload of weight." I love those days!

 

Shaun and I had lunch at this little place we used to go to all the time, but haven't been in awhile, and I realized: the chairs don't dig into my hips anymore.

 

We walked half away across town and then back and I realized: I'm not that tired.

 

I went into Old Navy and I bought everything in a size Large, even the 'non-stretchy' items. I realized: that's pretty much a 'normal person size'.

 

I tried on a super cute t-shirt dress at ON, which I instantly fell in love with. I want to purchase one in every colour except it's slightly impractical because it's too short to wear to work. But I love it and every time I look at myself in the mirror, it reminds me of how much smaller I am, compared to where I was.

 

 

In other news, I finally decided to try making a Green Monster! I used a cup of vanilla soy milk, a frozen banana, a tbsp of almond butter, and several handfuls of spinach. It's pretty delicious!

 

Here's the obligatory picture, but since you guys are probably sick of pictures of Green Monsters, I decided I'd mix it up a little for you by drinking it out of the giant skull mug I got in Vegas!

 

 

Also featuring a special cameo by my darling kitty Beezus, who is a special birthday girl this week! She turned eight! Actually, this picture is a pretty good example of what our life together has been like: you can tell she is rolling her eyes and thinking "What the crap are you doing now?"

 

That's all, my friends. I'm off to volunteer night #2! In my new dress, of course. :)

personal day.

Despite the fact that I just got back from vacation last weekend, I ended up taking a personal day today. It was sooooo relaxing. I did nothing but watch CSI, do a load of laundry, and go out and get frozen yogurt.

 

Tonight and tomorrow I'm volunteering with the Toronto Pride Festival, so that should be fun. I've done it the last couple of years and I always really enjoy it.

 

Gay rights are an issue that is really important to me, but I also have a friend who is heavily involved in Pride, so I like to be able to help him out. He's an amazing person and I can't even count the number of times he's helped me out, including moving me into my old apartment, complete with driving a U-Haul all the way from the rental place in the suburbs, complete with doing this the day after his birthday when he was super hungover. Can you imagine? -- Of course, he paid me back the next year on his birthday, when he THREW UP ON ME at the bar. Ha ha ha!  I still tease him about that, but I secretly believe it means we'll be friends for life. You can't stop being friends with someone once you've puked on them!

 

Here we are at Pride, I think 2 years ago? Whistle kissing! Awwww.

 

I really miss that haircut I had!

 

Anyway! The only downside to volunteering is there is about a bazillion pounds of free food for the volunteers, usually pizza.

 

I was getting all angsty, wondering how I'd work in these points, but then I thought, my shift is 9pm to 1am. That's not exactly dinner time, so there's no real reason for me to eat anything at that time. So I just ate a yummy filling dinner at home (whole wheat pasta with portabello mushrooms and baby clams, in tomato sauce), and I'll bring a grapefruit and a granola bar with me (just in case!) but that's it. When it comes to free food, sometimes it's easier just to not touch any of it, you know?

 

Okay, I'm off to get changed and then head out. Hope everyone's weekend is off to a great start!

for the heck of it.

Crystal tagged me in this meme, so I decided to fill it out! I am trying to distract myself until lunch time, because I'm starving!

Rules:
1. Respond and rework; answer the questions on your blog, replace one question that you dislike with a question of your invention & add one more question of your own.
2. Tag eight other people.

What is your current obsession? CSI! I don’t know why, for some reason I decided I needed to go back and watch all the old seasons.

What are you wearing today? Light grey capris, pink camisole, white cardigan, black and white zebra flats

What’s your favourite meal? So hard to choose! If I was being executed and had to pick my last meal, I'd probably pick steak, medium rare, with crispy french fries. But if I was picking a favourite 'every day' kind of meal, it'd be my low-fat butter chicken (with spinach), and spicy baked sweet potato.

What’s the last thing you bought? A coffee from Tim Horton’s. The last non-food thing I bought was … a season of CSI! Ha ha ha!

What are you listening to right now? A very loud meeting in the next room, and the hum of the air conditioning.

If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go? An island somewhere, with free drinks and a comfortable chair on the beach.

Which language do you want to learn? French, I guess. I used to be kinda okay at it, but I’ve forgotten it all.

What do you love most about where you currently live? The apartment itself sucks, but we’re steps away the ‘gay village’ where there is always something fun going on, 4 or 5 great patios to have drinks on, cute little cheese shops / produce markets / a butcher / a chocolate shop, and a place to get frozen yogurt!

What is your favorite colour? Red / pink

What is your favorite piece of clothing in your own wardrobe? Black linen cap-sleeved jacket

Describe your personal style? Casual and comfortable, with maybe a hint of cool? I hope?

If you had $300 now, what would you spend it on? Another pair of Merrell sandals (in brown!), some summer shirts, and stocking up the wine cabinet.

What are you going to do after this? Possibly some work…since that’s what I should be doing now.

What is something about you that most people don't know? I went to university when I was 16.

Your favorite smell? Millions! Grapefruit and other citrus scents, mint, the smell of good red wine, matches, rain, freshly mowed grass, homemade bread, roasting meat, charcoal barbecues, ocean, clean laundry… I could go on!

Do you collect anything? Not really. Shaun would say I collect books. I kind of have a lot (several hundred! :S)

What makes you follow a blog? Sense of humour, photos, something I can relate to, and secretly I follow some blogs because I can’t believe what a trainwreck that person is. Don’t worry, that doesn’t apply to any of you guys!

What's your favorite drink? Coffee, or red wine

What’s one thing you dream of doing? Travelling! I want to go to Cuba, and Italy, and Australia, and Egypt, and Greece, and I want to roadtrip across the southwestern US, and I want to go to Boston, and Cape Cod, and San Francisco, and Seattle, and I want to walk in the desert and swim in the Pacific ocean! Phew!

What is your biggest regret? Letting my finances get so out of control

What is your favorite thing to do on a rainy day? Watch movies with Shaun and order take-out!

Do you have a tattoo? Nope. Not sure I’d ever get one. I change my mind / tastes too often!

What are your favorite books? So many! I love my Nancy Drew books, and Harry Potter, I love the Fionavar Tapestry, I love the Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy series, recently I've gotten into mysteries, and I loved Tana French and am super sad she only has two books out!

Are you left handed, right handed, ambidextrous, or a little of both? Right handed

What is your favorite fruit? I like it all! Grapefruit probably, or, oooh, cherries!

Blackberry or iPhone? Neither! I have a super crappy Nokia. But I’d pick an iPhone if pressed.

What/Who inspired you to start your blog? Well, I’ve been blogging since about … 2001? WOW, that’s a long time. I was on Diary X back in the olden days, and then switched to Livejournal from about 2003 to 2008. Then when I decided to start losing weight I thought I’d start a separate blog to chronicle that. That was just after I’d stumbled across Dietgirl’s blog, so I guess you could say she inspired me.


I think a lot of people have already been tagged, so basically let's just say, fill this out if it appeals to you? You could even fill it out and leave it in my comments section, if you don't want to devote a whole blog post to it!

focus!

Okay! Now that my vacation is over, it’s time to get back on track! Well, okay, I guess I was never really that off track, since I’ve been sticking to my points, and going to boot camp, but I feel like my food choices haven’t been too stellar lately, and I’ve definitely been slacking on the ‘healthy guidelines’ and all that. Not to mention that I’m getting a bit bored with my usual meals.

But I’m feeling really focused again. I’m ready for a good challenge.


I was thinking of doing a one-week ‘clean eating’ challenge for myself. I like tough challenges with firm end points, so I think this will work for me. For one week, I’ll cut out: alcohol, artificial sweeteners, animal products, and anything overly processed. So I’ll eat mostly fruits and veggies, beans, legumes, nuts. I might allow in one serving of plain yogurt per day, just because I do think it helps my insides.

I’m already getting excited thinking of the different meals I can make, how I can fill myself up and eat yummy meals on such a limited ingredient list. Green monsters for breakfast, cauliflower and chick pea curry for lunch, baked sweet potatoes topped with black beans, homemade salsa and avocado for dinner, etc. Fruit and nuts for snacking, giant salads, gazpacho… I haven’t felt this jazzed about eating healthy in a while, so I think it’ll be good. And the one week deadline doesn’t make it seem too overwhelming.


I also decided to join Amy’s 15 Week Challenge, so that should be fun. I like that she plans to have little weekly challenges on healthy habits as well, rather than just the regular weight loss thing.


I’m actually getting pretty close to two big weight loss milestones: the 50 lb mark (4.4 lbs to go!) and ‘onderland’ (12 lbs to go!). And I guess I do worry about losing focus before I get there, so I’m thinking the time to get my energy and enthusiasm back up is NOW – while the getting is still good, if you know what I mean.

WI results and vacation eating.

Today was weigh-in day, but you’re going to have to read to the end to find out how I did. Or, okay, just scroll down if you’re really desperate to know.

*****

I wrote a whole long post before I left about vacation eating, and what my strategies were gonna be, but in the end, I just kind of ended up doing whatever.

The good things I did were:

- No snacking. I never ate until I was realllly hungry. So yes, I ate a Starbucks muffin for breakfast, and Panda Express for dinner, but those were the only things I ate alllll day.
- Despite the picture of me with the giant margarita, I mostly did stick to light beer, or the occasional glass of sangria or red wine.
- Only on two occasions did I eat to the point where I felt OVERLY full. All other times I stopped when I felt done.
- Walked a lot, and swam lengths in the pool in the mornings.


The bad things I did were:

- No snacking. I never ate until I was reallllly hungry. Which meant my ‘lack-of-food panic’ thing kicked in full blast. I’m pretty good at managing those feelings here at home – where I KNOW off hand lots of places to get healthy filling food. But in a strange city, the panic got a bit unbearable, and I usually found myself picking Wendy’s or greasy Chinese.
- ‘Splurged’ on boring things I could get anywhere, like Frosties from Wendy’s, and Starbucks glazed donuts.
- Didn’t drink nearly enough water.
- Didn’t walk as much as planned, although it was because Shaun pulled a muscle in his back just before we left, so obviously I wasn’t going to make him trek all over creation. So we took cabs and stayed closer to our hotel than we might have otherwise.

I did track everything I ate, as I said I would. Most days I seemed to eat around 60 points, which seems shocking to me, but beer and fries sure do add up. Before we left, I still had all my flex points, and a bank of about 30 activity points, so that took care of some of my indulgences, and I figure I probably earned about 8-10 activity points every day from walking around.

So how did I do? Well, by some miracle or fluke of nature …

I LOST 2 lbs!

I mean, WTF. Bodies make no sense! No sense whatsoever!


*** Okay, I want to add a disclaimer here, because I know if I was reading this post I would actually get kind of bummed, like, 'how come this person eats whatever she wants and still loses and I bust my ass and don't lose?!?!' Trust me, I totally get it. But the truth is, I've had pathetic losses (and even a gain!) over the last four weeks, despite, yes, busting my ass. Even though it's 'calories in, calories out', bodies do crazy things sometimes like hold on to a bunch of weight and then let it go all at once. I think my 'lucky' week just happened to coincide with my vacation. I am by no means taking this as a 'sign' that I should continue to eat whatever I want, and I hope no one reading this does either. This loss is the result of several weeks of hard work, not one week of indulging.

I hope that doesn't sound 'preachy'. I just felt like I should clarify because I know how annoying it is to hear about people eating like crazy and then losing weight.

i am returned.

1. I'm Back.

2. We Had The Best Time Ever.

3. I Love Vacations.

4. Pools Are Awesome and I Would Spend All My Time There If I Could.

 

5. I Ate Pretty Well.

6. Actually, I Probably Drank More Calories Than I Ate.

7. I Pledge My Allegiance To France (Or At Least To This Ginormous Eiffel Tower Shaped Margarita).

 

8.  It Turns Out Gambling Is Kind Of Stupid.

9.  So We Spent All Our Money on Fun Stuff Like Shows and Attractions.

10. Speaking of Attraction, I Heart The American President.

 

11. (Yes, Sadly, He IS Made of Wax.)

12. I Wish Vacations Could Last Forever.

13. Though I Did Miss My Kitties And Friends And Blogs.

14. Speaking Of Which, I Hope You Guys Are All Well, I Have Been Reading All Day And Am Still Not Caught Up!

15. Official Weigh In Will Be Tuesday, But Judging By My Home Scale, It Shouldn't Be Too Bad.

16. More Tomorrow, That's All I Have The Energy For Tonight. :)

out of office.

Okay, my friends, this is it! It's 5:40 am and we're just about to head out to the airport. I'll be back next Saturday! 

Have a healthy week! 

one crazy night OR i'll take that vacation now please.

Since I’m leaving tomorrow for Vegas (!!!) I seem to have had all kinds of errands to run this week. Last night involved going to pick up my birth control refill, since like a dummy I forgot until yesterday morning that I was going to need them next week. Anyway, I also had bootcamp last night, so I figured I’d do that first, and then go to the pharmacy afterwards. So a half hour to walk to bootcamp, an hour of doing bootcamp (in the rain! Boooo!), and a half hour to walk home from boot camp. Once I’m home I grab my bike and get ready to cycle to the pharmacy (which is across town). It's still raining but I figure, what the heck, I'm already wet.

Of course, I don’t have a backpack or anything practical like that, and I hate hanging my purse on my handle bars, so I did what any sporty spice would do: stuck my keys and bank card in my sports bra, and headed out.

Get to the pharmacy half an hour later, go to pay for my prescription, and ENNNNHHHHHHHHH (that is the sound of FAIL): my debit card was declined! There should be tonnes of money in that account, so what’s the deal? I start getting super stressed and paranoid because I’m leaving on SATURDAY and hello, I need a working debit card. Anyway, I had no back-up method of payment and no cell phone with me, but I really need this prescription, so I had no choice but to go home and get my Visa. It is still raining and I’m completely soaked and freezing cold and SUPER CRANKY by this point.

Anyway, I cycle home (another half hour), lock my bike up outside, and go in to grab my stuff. Come back outside and am just unlocking my bike again when I hear a huge CRASH. I look up and see two cars have SLAMMED into each other, and a fraction of a second later I realize that one of those cars is now out of control and careening towards me! I jump back and the car stops just a foot or so shy of where I’d been standing. Of course I’m the closest one so I rush up to the car to make sure the driver is okay, and suddenly there are tonnes of people everywhere and all four lanes of traffic (it’s a big road) are stopped and it’s like, Whoa, that’s the first time I’ve seen a real car crash. SCARY! Luckily everyone was okay. I stuck around until the police showed up, but since I hadn’t actually seen what happened, I figured I wasn’t much use as a ‘witness’, so I decided I’d continue on to the pharmacy.

Walk my bike down to the lights but I realize I’m shaking like a leaf. I’m cold and wet and frankly, kinda shook up. Luckily I run into Shaun who’s on his way home from the coffee shop, so after I tell him everything that happened, he tells me there is no way he’s letting me bike all the way across town. It’s almost 11pm by now and it’s dark and raining and I have no helmet and no bike light. I have to agree that he’s right so we go home.

Of course, I’m still paranoid about my debit card so we walk to the nearest store so I can try it again: The Dreaded Convenience Store. Now I have totally avoided convenience stores since I started WW, and I especially don’t go near them when I’m tired or stressed. Now I’m tired, stressed, cold, hungry, and I’m in a convenience store AND I HAVE to spend money! Ah! This is like a WW nightmare!

I wandered around that store for a good ten minutes. I gazed longingly at a giant bag of Smart Food. I lightly caressed a frozen pizza. I may have picked up a box of Kraft Dinner nuzzled it a little.

This was seriously one of the hardest ten minutes I’ve faced so far. I had a million thoughts going through my head and strangely both my pros and cons were all the same. Like, reasons why I SHOULDN’T buy crap were:

- You’re going on vacation in two days, so you should be as good as possible beforehand! and
- You burned so many calories already tonight, don’t blow it!

But my reasons why I SHOULD buy crap were the same:

- Oh, you’re going on vacation in two days anyway, who cares! and
- You already burned lots of calories, you can afford it!

The mind is a tricky thing.

In the end I bought two small containers of chocolate milk (one for me and one for Shaun), and I bought Shaun a bag of ketchup chips (since I hate that flavour.) So I made it through okay. And yes, my debit card worked. And no, I still haven’t gotten my prescription yet. But after loudly telling this whole story to my co-worker this morning, my boss has very kindly offered to let me leave early today. :)

So all’s well that ends well, and who the hell cares anyway because tomorrow I’m going to VEGAS!!!!

take a picture it'll last longer.

In the comments to my post yesterday, Skinny Me! told me to take lots of pictures while in Vegas so I could share them with you guys. Which of course I’m totally gonna do! But it made me realize something: I don’t fear photos anymore!

I’ve had to go to several work events lately and so I’ve ended up in lots of photos, and even some of the ‘official’ post-event slideshows. Seeing a picture of myself pop up when I’m scrolling through a Powerpoint document is still weird, but I don’t cringe the way I used to. I pause. I squint a little. Cock my head. And decide that I actually look pretty good.

So yeah: I like to see photos of myself now. And that makes me really happy. I’m excited to take lots of vacation photos, and I’m excited to get photos of Shaun and I together, because we barely have any.

There’s some irony here, because it was a photo from a work event that first made me realize that I HAD to do something about my weight. It was shocking to see how truly huge I’d gotten. I saved that picture to my desktop, and I looked at it almost every day, trying to work up the courage to change.

And change I have. I pouted a bit yesterday about only being down 0.8 lbs, but I’ve lost ALMOST 45 LBS! In 7 months!

And all the photos prove it. :)

WI results: the early edition.

I weighed in today, even though I normally go on Thursdays. (My new session of Boot Camp, which starts this week, conflicts with my regular Thursday WW meetings, so I'll be switching to this Tuesday lunch time meeting instead.

 

Anyway, long story short: down 0.8 lbs, total loss 43.6 lbs. I'm sort of happy about that, but not. I guess I expected to be down a lot more than that, especially since I was going from an evening weigh-in to a noon weigh in. Oh well.

 

So that's my last WI before VEGAS (!!!!). The kind of good thing is that it will be two full weeks before my next WI, but I'll only be away for 8 days in there. So I'll have almost a whole week (3 days before the trip and 3 days after) to keep things reigned in. I hope that, combined with all the walking we're going to be doing in VEGAS (!!!!) will mean that two weeks from now, when I do weigh in again, I won't be too far off where I am now.

weekend update.

Hello kittens! I hope everyone's been having an excellent weekend. It is with mixed emotions that I tell you that Friday's post was a pretty good indicator of how my weekend went. Good times, lots of empty calories.

 

On the plus side I did lots of walking (over 5 miles on Saturday), biked to and from a party last night, and did my C25K run today. So not a total write-off.

 

I bought these FABULOUS sandals on Saturday. They are Merrells and I love them! They look half like trendy gladiator-style sandals and half like orthotics. So they're one part cool and one part little old lady, hence: perfect for me.

 

They were $100 which is more than I usually pay for shoes, but I'm so glad I bought them. I walked those 5 miles on Saturday wearing these shoes, and that was my first time wearing them -- that's pretty much unheard of for me, sandals usually come with a long and painful breaking-in period.

 

I'm seriously considering buying a second pair in brown.

why it's good to weigh in on Thursdays ...

Cause then you don't have to worry about doing this on Friday.

WI results and a sort of NSV.

This week at WI I was down 1.2 lbs. Total loss so far, 42.8 lbs. Not too shabby. I was secretly hoping to be under 210 by the time we left for Vegas, but with only one WI left, that’s not looking likely. Oh well – I’m happy with where I am now. And you know what? I was thinking about Vegas, and how much walking we’re going to be doing while we’re there, and I realized: I probably couldn’t have gone on this vacation 8 months ago. I couldn’t have done that much walking.

Eight months ago, I was having to take prescription pain-killers / muscle-relaxants for my back (not every day but very frequently), and there were days I LITERALLY could not get out of bed. There’s no way I could have taken a vacation that required that much walking. The good news is, my back hasn’t bothered me once since I started losing weight, and I haven’t had to take a single pill. (I always knock on wood when I say that though – although the weight thing has helped alleviate the pressure, I don’t think the alignment issues have gone away. No idea what to do about that though … chiropractor? PT? Massage?)

Anyway. I feel great about that. I’m excited that I’m going to be able to trek around Vegas with my sweetie, and only be a normal amount of tired at the end of the day. That’s something pretty special.

vacation eating.

YOU GUYS I am going to Vegas in 8 days! Oh my gosh, I can barely contain myself.

Since this is my first vacation in, like, ever, I’m already stressing a little about food stuff.

Okay, here are my feelings on dieting and travel. If you travel a lot, and to the same places (i.e, business type travel), then yeah, you should try to keep your eating as close to ‘normal’ as possible. I also do not think you should ever just naturally conclude that going on a ‘vacation’ means a ‘vacation from eating well’. If you’re thinking about eating well as something you need a ‘vacation’ from, then you’re already in trouble.

All that said, I DO think that leisure travel is about experiencing a new place. And I think that a big part of experiencing a city or region or country is the food. If I were going to India I would want to eat lots of curries and if I was going to England I’d be eating at chip stands and since I’m going to VEGAS I do very much intend to eat at buffets and fancy fusion restaurants and drink margaritas by the pool. I am not going to live off peanut butter and jelly sandwiches that I make in my hotel room. (Or at least not entirely.)

I guess my eating approach is going to be ‘maximum enjoyment’. Please note, that doesn’t mean ‘maximum indulgence’. I know that if I indulge at every meal, I won’t actually enjoy it. I’ll feel lethargic, stuffed, and possibly even sick. (My stomach does NOT do well with too much grease now.) My goal will be to find that sweet spot, at every meal, of enjoying the experience of being in Vegas and the food I’m eating, but balanced with how I’ll feel an hour later (and a week later when I step on the scale.) I probably won’t hit the sweet spot every time, but my hope is that if I go into every meal conscious of that goal, I should do okay.

I should add that I’m okay if I come back and have a reasonable gain. (I would consider reasonable to be 3lbs or less.) If I were aiming to lose, I’d approach this differently.

*****

My biggest fear is actually not that I’ll screw up in Vegas, but that I’ll have a really hard time getting back on track once I’m home. I’ve seen it happen again and again in blogland – people go on vacation, and totally fall apart when they get back. You get in the habit of eating decadent things, and then you want to maintain that ‘vacation feeling’ when you get home, so you KEEP eating decadent things. I even had this problem over the holidays – I planned really well for the holidays themselves, but then struggled the first couple weeks of January because my plan didn’t extend that far.

So!

I have two ideas for how I’m going to combat that. One is that I’m going to keep tracking while I’m there. Yes, even if I go over my points by the hundreds, I’m going to write it all down. I think tracking is a habit I should keep up with. (Plus it will be a nice vacation memory – months later I can look back at my tracker and think, “oh yeah, remember when we had those crab cakes at blah blah blah restaurant in Vegas? Man, they were good.”)

My other plan is to do some grocery shopping before I leave. I know produce and milk and stuff won’t keep well while we’re gone, BUT I plan to make sure I have at least a couple of easy meals ready to eat at home when I get back, and I want them as close to my normal eating as possible. So for instance, we get back Saturday evening, and I plan to have an Amy’s frozen entrée in the freezer that I can eat that night if I’m hungry. My usual breakfast is oatmeal, almond butter, and sliced banana, so I’ll have that ready for Sunday morning. (The oatmeal and AB is no problem, the banana I’m thinking I might peel and slice it before we go, and then put it in the freezer.

I know I probably seem like I’m overthinking all of this, but the truth is, it’s a fact about me that I do really well when I’m in a routine. And Vegas is going to be a HUGE deviation in my routine.

How do you guys handle vacation / travel? Do you think I’m being too hard on myself? Not hard enough? What do you do about exercise? I’m still really debating whether or not to bring my workout clothes. The gym is $25 a day (!!!), and I don’t know if it’s feasible to work out outside.

more fun with foods.

I found a new (to me) and delicious (to me) food today: smoked tofu! YUM. I like all things smoked (cheeses, meats, etc.) and I like tofu (the firmer the better), so I thought this would be a win, and I'm delighted that it was.

 

I used it to make a wrap. I topped a whole wheat pita with 2 tbsp. hummus, 1/4 avocado, half a tomato, a handful of mixed baby greens, some alfalfa sprouts, and the smoked tofu, sliced. I used about 1/3 of the package (it comes in a small square, about the size of a small package of cheese slices.) It worked out to be 2pts (for the tofu. The wrap in total was 8pts.)

 

I loved this wrap! The smoked tofu ended up tasting more like smoked cheese, once it was mixed up with everything else. I am all in favour of things tasting like cheese.

 

Of course, my wrap had the same problem as most of my wraps do. I was too ambitious in filling it up! Here is me playing a game called "Will this fit in my mouth?" (That's what she said. Heh.)

 

 

 

I also tried out another Hungry Girl recipe: her 'dreamy chocolate peanut butter fudge'. It's a brownie mix with canned pumpkin and peanut butter. I'm letting it cool now, but it smells and looks delish.

 

body image and ... a food image. :)

Thanks for everyone’s comments on my last post! I think you all were right, that it IS hard to see a difference in yourself sometimes, so I appreciate your more ‘objective’ feedback.

I guess part of my problem is that the size I am now is actually the size I've been IMAGINING myself at for the last three years or so. I was pretty in denial about how much weight I’d put on, so I was still imagining myself in my 220 lb body, not the 260 lb one I was actually inhabiting. That’s why pictures were such a horrible shock – could I really look like that? Well, yes: I could, and I did.

But now that I’ve lost that 40 lbs, my body is much closer to that mental picture I’ve been clinging to for so long. So even though the logical part of me knows I’m doing great, there’s the part of me that's saying, “Huh? What’s the big deal, this is what you always looked like. Shouldn’t you be, like, skinny by now?”

*****

I'm super happy with the dinner I had tonight. First let me say, it’s Monday, which is already pretty craptacular, and despite the fact that it’s June 1, it is freezing cold and rainy and windy outside – it honestly feels like October.

So what did I do? I made my own summer. I made up a batch of Hungry Girl ‘chicken fingers’, some sweet potato fries, peppercorn ranch salad dressing for dipping, a big bowl of watermelon, and a can of diet old-fashioned cream soda. Check out this spread:

By the way, the HG chicken fingers were pretty good! Although I found it kinda disconcerting that the Fibre 1 was a tad sweet. I might keep an eye out for a high fibre cereal that's completely unsweetened. The texture and tenderness were both excellent though, and it was pretty easy and fast to make. Thumbs up on my first HG recipe!